Title: Only On Stage(1/3)
Pairing: MaruxBaru, slight Ohyass and (if you squint) Yokohina
Genre: Angst, H/C, Fluffy
Summary: Because of their intimate acts on stage, Shibutani Subaru has developed a certain feeling towards Maruyama Ryuhei. But what about Maru? Does he feel the same?
Notes: Recently I develop an obsession towards Subaru. And I joined marubaru. There, I found MaruxBaru LOVE Pimp Post of DOOM made by kooriyoukai. And all of a sudden I have this story stuck in my head so I decided to make a fics on it. I hope you enjoy it. ^___^
Only on Stage
Subaru Shibutani was packing his assorted bags into the big black bag he carried with him to work this morning. Their television performance shoot of their song “Eden” had finally done today. Subaru personally loved this song and he couldn’t help humming the song again and again under his breath as he was packing. Everyone, including another Kanjani8 member was getting ready to leave the studio to go back to their own daily life.
Yoko and Hina were going to have dinner together in one of Yoko’s many favorite restaurants.
Ryo had another schedule with NEWS today and Subaru felt a bit pity for him. That kid was working too hard, is what Subaru always thinks of Ryo. But Ryo seemed content with the way he lived his life so Subaru found he had nothing to say to that self-proclaimed Sexy Osaka Man.
Subaru knew what a content feeling on one’s work could provide. He himself had had his days of doubt on his work and it left him feeling empty inside. But when he finally set his goal in life, a content feeling he felt every time he did his work gave him a very pleasant sensation and life was getting better just because of that.
Tadayoshi and yasu were chatting away in the corner of the set. Yasu looked energetic as usual and he practically glowed around Tadayoshi, while Tacchon seemed relaxed and let Yasu did all the talk, all the while never let off his gaze on that shortest member of the group. Subaru was smiling when he looked at them both. Nobody knew for sure, but Tacchon and Yasu was pretty much an item these days. Not that Subaru complained. They looked happy, and that was what matters.
And then he spot Maru from the corner of his eyes. Without intending to, Subaru stopped doing what he was doing and watching Maru instead. Maru was eating his share of bentou with a happy smile on his face. Subaru couldn’t stop a sigh from escaping his mouth.
Today too, Maru and he were being so lovey dovey in the performance.
Subaru didn’t know honestly how it was all begun. He had known Maru from the first time he joined the jimusho’s audition. Thus, he was one of Kansai juniors that Subaru was close with. Subaru realized that Maru’s degree of weirdness was the same level as his, and when both of their tensions were up, they always ended up doing something crazy and strange on the stage.
And one day, on Maru’s initiative, they had ended up doing intimate acts on stage. And somehow, it had been going on until today. Sometimes Subaru would just simply throw his hand over Maru’s shoulder and clung to him like that until the show ended. Or sometimes Maru would hug him so closely from behind that Subaru could feel Maru’s steady heartbeat on his back.
But sometimes, they went much much further. They would pretend to kiss behind Maru’s mic with Maru hugging him so tight. Maru would grope him on the crotch out of the blue, or simply slap Subaru’s ass around. They looked at each other’s face so close so often that Subaru could map Maru’s face without looking at it or tell anyone who ask what colour gradation Maru’s eyes had exactly.
And Subaru was just fine with it. He went with the flow to the point of when the group was together, Subaru would place himself beside Maru unconsciously. Like it was the norm.
Without realizing it, Subaru had gotten used to Maru’s presence in his life. Subaru only had a few friends and somehow Maru had become the person he cherished the most. Maru understood him. Having that kind of quality from a friend was a rare treat for Subaru. So Subaru really enjoyed the days he spent with Maru. He went out with Maru the most. He told Maru about his dreams, his fear, his problems. And always, always, Maru knew what to say or what to do. And Subaru had become dependant on him for that.
But recently, it was bugging the hell out of him. Somehow, Subaru was being restless.
Lately, he realized he had developed a certain feeling towards the bassist. He couldn’t help but longed for Maru’s touch more and more everyday. His heart started to beat louder and uncontrollable when Maru was close. His eyes followed Maru by instinct and Subaru was being more and more self-conscious in Maru’s present. For god sake, he blushed so much from all the lovey dovey act he did with Maru that it was a wonder no one hadn’t noticed it until now. And Maru, being Maru, seemed completely clueless on this particular change on Subaru’s side. Subaru thanked God for it. But there was one thing that concerned Subaru.
Maru on stage and Maru off stage was a different person. Oh, he was still this nice, friendly guy. He was also still a bit silly although he was a lot quieter off stage. He won’t be one of Subaru’s precious friends if he wasn’t.
What’s different was the way he acted towards Subaru. When they were off stage, all of a sudden there was no more hugging, snuggling, and groping traded between both of them, at least from Maru’s part. Once off stage, somehow Maru kept this certain distance where they were friends and nothing more. And it frustrated Subaru to the core.
Subaru was always proud on the fact that he was a person who always tried hard to do his best and not to lose from others. And in love matters, it wasn’t an exception.
Subaru had tried, as far as his shy personality permitted, to show his feeling towards the bassist. Every time they went out together, Subaru would send some signals here and there. Every time they were being lovey dovey on stage, Subaru would do it with all of his feelings so that it would be conveyed to Maru. But all of that effort only resulted in opposite desired reaction from Maru.
Instead of reaching an understanding and happy ending like Subaru hoped, Maru was putting more and more distance from Subaru. Recently, Maru always had reason to reject Subaru’s invitation to go out together. Subaru even felt that Maru was being colder towards him.
But Subaru couldn’t just let go and surrender, because on stage, Maru was all over him again. And whether it was only wishful thinking on Subaru’s part, but Subaru could swear that he could feel affection from all of Maru’s attention for him on stage. That’s why, even though it bugged him so much, Subaru couldn’t stop doing all effort he could think of to get even closer with Maru.
Today too, Subaru had planned to ask Maru out for a dinner together. There was this new yakiniku restaurant that Maru would definitely like. Subaru had even gone so far to make a reservation for both of them. And he was nervous and afraid that this time Maru would reject him again. But he had determined to do this. So, after finished packing, Subaru walked towards Maru.
“Ne, Maru…” Subaru sat in front of still eating Maru.
Maru looked up from his bentou and was smiling to Subaru. “What is it, Shibuyan?”
Suddenly Subaru felt self conscious. Fidgeting with his hands, he answered, “Ano… There’s this new yakiniku restaurant open in town…”
Maru’s face was suddenly changed. His forehead was wrinkling and Subaru, upon seeing this unpleasant reaction, had to struggle to finish his invitation.
“Umm, since other members seemed like already having plans of their own, I was wondering if you want to accompany me there to eat dinner tonight.” Subaru said nervously.
There was a silence for a few seconds and Subaru felt sick all of a sudden.
Maruyama had stopped eating and put down his bentou along with his chopstick. His expression was so gloomy that before Maru even said it, Subaru could already tell that he was going to reject his invitation. Again.
“Gomen, ne, Shibuyan? I still have errands to do tonight.” Maru’s eyes wouldn’t meet Subaru’s. “Maybe next time?”
Subaru felt like he could cry at this time for the disappointment he felt, but he gritted his teeth and tried to smile. “Un, Daijoubu.”
Usually, at this point, Subaru would give up and walk away. But today, he was desperate. It had been months ago since the last time he went out with only Maru and he had had enough of this stupid weird atmosphere between them. Subaru intended to confess to Maru tonight at the restaurant and found out what he felt about him. And if it turned out that Maru didn’t feel the same way as he did, they would settle it like any civilized person would and put an end to this strange relationship, hopefully continue the friendship they’ve had all this time.
That’s why, Subaru didn’t walk away. He nervously watched Maru who still hadn’t continued eating his bentou and just sitting there silently instead.
“Demo… ano… I’ve made reservation and all.” Subaru laughed nervously. “It would be a waste, don’t you think?”
Maru’s eyes got bigger as he apparently felt surprised. The wrinkles on his forehead got deeper. Subaru didn’t like the expression Maru had. Not at all.
“Ah, it would, wouldn’t it?”Maru nodded with a wry smile. “But I really have to finish this errand tonight, Shibuyan. I’m sorry.”
“Ah, well, forget about the stupid restaurant then. What if I accompany you doing this errand? What is it exactly? I’m sure it’ll be more fun if we both go and do it.”
Subaru realized fully that he was pressing Maru. But he had a strong determination and that’s why he tried to ignore the troubled look on Maru’s face upon hearing his suggestion.
“Ah, actually I’ve promised to do it with a friend already. It is my mom’s errand. Nothing important so you don’t have to worry about it, Shibuyan.” Maru smiled apologetically.
“Why don’t you find another friend of yours to go to the restaurant? It will be a shame to waste the reservation, won’t it?”
And with those words, Subaru knew that it was useless to continue asking Maru further. He tried to hide his disappointment and acted as if it was nothing.
“Maa, okay then. It can’t be helped, right? Maybe next time.” Subaru smiled at Maru, stood up and returned to where his bag laid on the floor. With a sigh, he picked it up and walked to studio exit, decided not to look back or said goodbye to everyone. He felt awful, but no matter how many times he exhaled, the weight on his chest just won’t go away.
Comments are loved. ^__^